How to : How to Hug Romantically

Method 1

Method 1 of 2:

The Frontal Hug

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Position your arms to draw your torsos together. In a romantic hug, your torsos—your chests and stomachs—will touch. This is a wonderfully warm and intimate position that emphasizes closeness.^{[1]

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Generally, the taller hugger puts their arms around the waist of the shorter person, while the shorter hugger puts their arms around the neck or shoulders of the taller person. The opposite can also happen, especially if there’s a big height difference: the taller person places their arms around the other person’s shoulders (and draws them into their chest), while the other person wraps their arms around the waist.}
2

Make head contact. Leaning your head on or against someone is a signal of intimacy. Move your head to the side as you lean in to give a romantic hug (in the US, most people will automatically move to their right.) Don’t go too far to the side, though—you want your cheek to brush up against the other person’s face. To add an extra romantic touch, nuzzle your head or even your face into the head/neck of the other person (or chest, if you’re much shorter than the person you’re hugging).^{[2]

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3

Squeeze and hold. A romantic hug lasts longer than a platonic hug. Gently clutch a little tighter for two or three seconds. Take a deep breath and exhale; relax into the hug and enjoy it. Note that your squeeze should be strong enough to be noticeable, but not so tight that it prevents him or her from breathing normally. Causing your hugging partner to pass out from lack of oxygen is not considered romantic in most circles.^{[3]

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4

Use your hands. Rub one of your hands on their back or arm a few times. Or if your hand is by the person’s head, gently stroke their hair, or the back of their neck. A slow caress is romantic. A brisk caress is comical, unless it’s freezing outside and you’re warming up your hugging partner.
5

Let go slowly. As you pull away, keep your hands on the other person so you’re still touching each other after you hug. This is a good time to look into each other’s eyes, smile, and speak from the heart.

Method 2

Method 2 of 2:

The Front-to-Back Hug

1

Come from behind. One way to enhance spontaneity is to surprise your love with a hug from behind. As long as they aren’t doing anything too important, wrapping your arms around their waist, and resting your head against theirs can be a super sweet surprise.
2
Stand behind the person you are going to hug. Press your torso up against the back person you are hugging, and wrap your arms around them. It doesn’t matter so much if you are taller or shorter, other than where your hands will end up.
- Generally, the taller hugger relaxes their upper arms, and reaches around to hug with their lower arms. The shorter hugger can hold their arms straight out, rather than bending at the elbow.
3

Place your arms in front. You can “stack” one arm on top of the other, one arm in front of the other, or even reach up over the chest and hold the shoulders of the person you are hugging; it all depends on the size of your arms and the size of the hugged one where your arms are best placed.
4

Make head contact. Like the front-facing hug, leaning your head on or against someone is a signal of intimacy. If you are as tall or taller than the hugged one, you can nuzzle their face or neck. If you are shorter, you can rest your head sideways on their back.
5

Squeeze and hold. A romantic hug lasts longer than a platonic hug. Gently clutch a little tighter for two or three seconds. Take a deep breath and exhale; relax into the hug and enjoy it.
6

Use your hands. For the person being hugged, caressing your huggers arms is a natural, lovely touch. You can also reach back and caress their face or hair. For the hugger, though, caressing can become fairly intimate without much effort. If you’re at that level with the person you are hugging, this is a delightful way to begin intimacies. If not, proceed with caution. It can result in the ice being broken, or your nose being broken. A slow caress is romantic.
7

Rotate your hugged one around. Enjoy a front-facing hug as you enjoy the closeness of your partner. Should you need further direction, start at the top of the page again. Enjoy!

Tips

A hug brings someone up close and personal, so keep body odor at bay. At the same time, remember that perfume, cologne and breath mints can all make a romantic hug more enjoyable when used lightly. Nothing can draw you out of the moment more than an unpleasant odor emanating from you or your partner, and this can include overpowering perfume.

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Hugging is like dancing or kissing; it’s interactive. You feed off the energy of the other person, and you can’t force a response.

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Do everything slowly. Quick grab-and-grins are for people you don’t know or family members you don’t particularly like; slower hugs are meant for someone whose presence you want to savor. Also, because a romantic hug is such an intimate interaction, you’ll want to give the other person plenty of time to stop you if he or she feels uncomfortable. Don’t move at a glacial pace, but do lean in slowly enough that the other person can know what you’re doing.

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Warnings

Not everyone enjoys hugging, even in a romantic relationship. It’s important to communicate openly if you feel your hugging gesture has been rebuffed and to accept it if you discover that your partner really doesn’t like being hugged.

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Ask them if you can hug them if the relationship just started or if you are trying to get to know them.

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Don’t hug someone without permission, even if you’re in a relationship.

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